Tuesday Newsday

The hysteria of the weekend is behind us.

I love Tuesdays as it is the day BOTH my husband and children are gone, and the day I spend cleaning the house from top to bottom, as it doesn't get done pretty much all weekend since we aren't here.

Dagny and I spent Saturday at out in the boonies with the rest of her troop getting trained for our neighborhood camp out. The (air quote)funny thing(end air quote) is that the girls are to be 100% responsible for their weekend. They plan the menu, do all the prep, dish washing, and COOKING of the meal. I will spend the weekend eating meals prepared by 10 9 year olds, and I can only imagine how delicious the cuisine shall be. Add that to my complete loathing for camping in general and well, we are in for one fun filled weekend. But I will hide my grimace and don my bravest face because my little Brownies are worth it. They are graduating to Juniors this summer and will be acknowledged in front of the other 300 or so GS who make up our neighborhood council. We spent the next afternoon selling cookies at a local store. That was our FINAL sale. We are done, done, done. Dagny did pretty well. I have to see what she earned at open sales, but I think she'll break the 250 mark. She wanted to sell 350, but we have this other thing called a life, and we would have needed to forfeit that in order for her to reach that goal.

At yesterday's lesson, D was surprised to learn she has a new horse to train on. It is another pony, but it is a BIG pony, and she is delighted. Her name is Shadow and she is a dream to ride. Dagny was cantering all over the place which scares the hell out of me because it is so darned fast and she is so high up, and OMG I just know she's going to bounce right off. Her teacher assures me she's fine, and that she has wonderful balance. I may need a prescription for Xanax when she begins galloping.

No new news on B and I ...His hand is healing nicely and he should be ready to kick some Dingus butt at Laser Tag very, very SOON. We are excited for March's arrival, as we will be able to say " We are going to Hawai'i next month" We have so many other cool, non touristy things we want to do this time, as well as knowing which luau we want to go to and which Sunday Brunch we shall hit. Because for us, it is all about the food.

Off to clean, organize, dust, vacuum, wash and fold...

Dagny: "Maybe I'll be a nurse when I grow up"

Jack :" Gross, then you'd have to milk the babies"

D: " You are so stoopid....you can not milk a BABY"

J: " That's NOT what I mean...Nurses, take the babies to the Nursery, when the moms want to sleep, and they nurse them. Why do you think it's called a NURSERY? YOU are stoopid."

D; " No YOU are..."

J: " NO YOU ARE..."

coninue over and over


but then I started thinking .....Do you think that's the way the word "nursery" came about ? And if so? How Gross is that? Like there were all these lactating women in there and the princesses would send their infants down to be fed? Someone Google this PLEASE...


And if it's true, how scare-ily smart is my son?

Friday Quiz

You Are Most Like Heidi Klum

Girl next door vibe with top model looks

Which Victoria's Secret Angel Are You?

I can not tell you how much I love This Blog

This girl reminds me so much of me, 15 years ago. I can't remember how I linked to her, but tell me if you love her as much as I do...

Loooong day

9:00 - 11:00 PTO Board Meeting for our High School and all feeder schools. Excited to hear what other schools are doing

12:00 lunch

1:00 - 3:00 Volunteer in D's class

3:30-4:30 D has Jr Lifeguard Training swim class

5:00- choke down dinner

5:30-8:30 Art Night at school. Our troop is going to sell cookies at the event, so we need to man the booth for three hours, as well as try to take turns sneaking away to watch our children, which I of course, have two of.

Dagny is performing a few different times, she has a solo, as well as a group dance with her and her friends. Jack is going to perform "walking on stilts" and "balancing a feather on his nose".... please save your applause.

9:00 try to stay awake through DVR'd Survivor

60 more days

8 1/2 weeks

My bikins arrived yesterday, as did 5 new pairs of flip-flops ( because you can never, ever own enough flip flops and they are the only shoes I wear, even in da' rain)

Just ordered the kids their water shoes from Land's End, as the coral will cut the hell out of your feet. Good thing I did as one pair was backordered until March 12.

60 more days

8 1/2 more weeks

Me organizing boxes and boxes of G1rl Scout c00kies

Phone Rings

Me: Hello

Caller: Hello, may I speak to Burt?

Me: You must have the wrong number

Caller: So there is no Bert Mc(slaughters our last name) at this number?

Me: There is a Brian, but no Burt

Caller: Oh, I apologize, I have it written down as Burt. Anyways, I am calling on behalf of the Democratic Party and was wondering if Bur- uh, Brian was available?

Me: (Burst out laughing) No, no he's not here right now, but boy do I wish he was...I would LOVE to hear your conversation with him. Would you like to call back later?

Caller: Uh, no, that's alright. Thank you.

Now if you know the way politics work around this house, you would think this very funny, as Burt will most definitely not be voting Democratic. But Burt's wife will. I think from now on, we should all call Burt, Burt. Somehow Burt seems a more fitting name, no?

relaxing

surfers

We are home safe and sound

I am sure I have mentioned this repeatedly, but I have a general dislike for car trips. Mostly because I can't stand driving. Driving used to give me panic attacks and God forbid I see a four car accident because literally, I stop breathing, hands and feet go numb, and I used to start crying. I didn't get my drivers license until I was about 26, and I only got it then because my husband forced me too. I would rather fly back and forth across the country 400 times with my children rather than drive across the country with them once. I am sure if you did some probability equation, it would come up with an answer such as we would be dead 10 times over in the car trip as opposed to dying once in a plane crash. When we got home, we had to listen to the story over and over about a family of four, from our town, driving on the same road we were, in a crash that left the mother, father, and son dead. The grandmother was the only survivor. I hear that and I think why? Why them? Why were we saved? There was no factor...No speed, no alcohol, no other cars involved. Maybe he swerved to avoid hitting a raccoon. Who knows, but now, they are all gone. Everytime I reach my destination after a long long car ride, I say a little thank you prayer.


Anyhoo, yes, we are back. However, my body decided to give me a little reminder of my vacation. When I woke up Tuesday morn to go potty, I was treated to the feeling of something like a corkscrew getting pulled out of kook-a-doo while peeing. I had a raging screaming UTI that cam out of nowhere and slammed me onto the bathroom wall. My body is used to drinking gallons and gallons of water a day. I LOVE water, especially ice water. I drink water non stop all day long. So when I go on vacation and have coffee and juice for breakfast, wine with lunch, and dinner, liters of clam chowder, fried shrimp, fresh chocolate, and hey, pass the cotton candy. Well it sort of goes into septic shock and basically shuts down. I looked at the clock and realized it was 5:00 am and that help or any sort of relief was HOURS away.

I got both kids up and dressed and out the door, ran to Freddies for some *gag* 100% cranberry juice. I open it in the car and start choking it down. D asks me why I am drinking something that is obviously very unpleasant tasting. I try to explain to her the situation, and she in turn, decides to tell me how yeah, that happens to her all the time, especially when she swings at recess and all I am thinking is " OMG there are razor blades stabbing in my cooter and will you please shut the hell up about the SWINGS" but I just grimace and say oh, huh, really, interesting.

I call my OBGYN as soon as they open, leave a message, and pray, pray, pray that they aren't going to call back and tell me how my PAP is overdue by a month and why don't we make you an appointment because I can barely stand up. In addition, my son wasn't feeling well and stayed home with me. I was trying to figure out how I was going to explain to him why mommy's legs were in these strange contraptions and "Oh look over there! I think I saw a unicorn fly by ! No, keep looking over THERE in a different DIRECTION" and all of the psychological damage I would be doing to him all because one day he was sick and I had to go in for a pelvic exam.

But my wonderful Beautiful OBGYN, did no such thing, she called it in and then called back to say AND lets schedule you your PAP. She also recommended some pill one can take now to help alleviate some of the pain caused by UTI's. I grab my son's tired sick little body up out of bed and drag him to the grocery store where we get all of our prescriptions. After I a few other items on my list, I head over to the pharmacy. I look up and down the aisle for this medicine that will make my kook-a-doo feel better. I approach the desk, grateful that it's a woman, and not the man behind her and I say as quietly as possible

"I have a prescription to pick up for sillypants, and in addition I am looking for this pill called Uri a something or other and I can't seem to find it can you help me please?" and I can already feel my face blushing because I blush all the time and it is so stoopid. I say "butt" and I blush. I know that probably SURPRISES many of you who lurk here. But I only think like a sailor, I don't talk like one ( well except for at Girls Weekend and DBC) so here I am asking some perfect stranger about medicine for my you know what and I am all red and flustered and she says, you know real loud " HUH? I have never heard of that? Hey Bob, you ever hear of Uri something or other, for URINARY TRACT INFECTIONS?!" and I am like OMG are you KIDDING ME ? Hey I know, why don't you do a PRICE CHECK over the freaking INTERCOM ?

Bob says ( equally as loud): "yes I've heard of it, but I don't know if we carry it"

Girl: " Huh, do you think it's over on aisle 9 with all of the YEAST INFECTION CREAMS"

Bob:" Oh, she has a YEAST INFECTION? I thought it was a URINARY TRACT INFECTION."

Girl: " No, it IS a URINARY TRACT INFECTION. I just thought it might be over by the YEAST INFECTION products."

I am about this close to crawling into a hole and freaking dying. DYING. How on earth can these people be screaming about my vagina in public? I am purple, purple I tell you. Now I know it could be much, much worse. I could have an@l w@rts or something much more extreme and I know millions of people have UTI's every day, but when it is your vagina on the line and everyone in the store gets to hear about it, it is extremely embarrassing.

Then, my ever helpful 7 year old decides to add at the top of his lungs, while sitting at the blood pressure taker thingy, taking his blood pressure for the 200 time, " Yeah, she says that when she PEES IT FEELS LIKE THEIR ARE RAZOR BLADES IN THERE AND...."

and I clamp my hand down so hard across that boys mouth and say " thanks, I think I can handle this"

He says " YEAH BUT...."

"Shut it or I am putting back the maple bar. Got it?"


Turns out they DON'T carry that particular brand of medication, but the pharmacist is going to look into stocking it and thanks me for calling his attention to it. And I think "YOUR attention?"

?'s answered by Jack ( age 7) one year later

2. Diamonds or pearls? pearls, because they are more white, and I don't like to see through things, like diamonds
3. What was the last film you saw at the movies? Hmm that's tough, I have seen a lot of movies in my life.....
4. What is your favorite TV show? Sponge Bob, Jimmy Neutron, Fairly Odd Parents
5. What did you have for breakfast? waffles w butter and syrup
6. What is your middle name? Edward
7. What is your favorite cuisine? chocolate, Taco Bell, PB and J sands, PB and Honey sands, Fig Newtons, Chicken Noodle Soup, Go-gurt, S'mores
8. What foods do you dislike ? Samoas, salad
9. What is your favorite chip flavor? sour cream and onion cheez-its
1 0. What is your favorite CD at the moment? Always Green Day.. at all times and every moment
11. What type of car do you drive? I don't drive a car
12. Favorite sandwich? turkey mayo
13. What characteristic do you despise? I don't like it when people stink
14. Favorite item of clothing? My Green Day shirt
15. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation, where would you go? Madagascar
16. What color is your bathroom? black and white
17. Favorite brand of clothing ? Target, because that's where I got my Green Day shirt
18. Where would you retire to? I will go to HAwaii, but only if my mom goes with me.
19. Favorite time of the day? video game time
20. What was your most memorable birthday? My Pump It Up party when I turned 7.
.21. Where were you born? Portland, Oregon
22. Favorite sport to watch? soccer and basketball
.25. What fabric detergent do you use? Kaboom!
26. Coke or Pepsi? 7-Up
27. Are you a morning person or a night owl? Morning
28. What is your shoe size? don't know
29. Do you have any pets? 2 dogs,
30. Any new and exciting news you would like to share with family &friends? I am going to Hawaii !!
31. What did you want to be when you were a child? fat

?'s answered by Dags ( age 9) , one year later...

2. Diamonds or pearls? diamonds, because they are prettier, shinier and they glitter alot
3. What was the last film you saw at the movies? Herbie Fully Loaded II
4. What is your favorite TV show? Kim Possible, Malcom in the Middle, Simpsons, Animal Cops Detriot, Survivor, American Idol
5. What did you have for breakfast? waffles w/ butter syrup
6. What is your middle name? Jean
7. What is your favorite cuisine? shrimp & sushi,
8. What foods do you dislike ? lots of candy, makes my tummy hurt
9. What is your favorite chip flavor? sour cream and onion
1 0. What is your favorite CD at the moment? Jessica Simpson
11. What type of car do you drive? I would like to drive a red convertable-horse powered-4 wheel drive, really shiny with leather seats ( God help us)
12. Favorite sandwich? turkey, cheddar, lettuce, tomato
13. What characteristic do you despise? people that talk too much
14. Favorite item of clothing? summer outfits and swim suits
15. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation, where would you go? Hawaii
16. What color is your bathroom? brown
17. Favorite brand of clothing ? Old Navy, Gap, Target
18. Where would you retire to? Portland, because it's nice and peaceful
19. Favorite time of the day? After school, because you can do all these activities... you can swim, you can play, you can get your homework done.
20. What was your most memorable birthday? My 5th birthday, my Unicorn Princess. I had a pink cake with cardboard castles cut out of it. We had a castle made and grandpa was the big troll !
.21. Where were you born? Portland, Oregon
22. Favorite sport to watch? I don't like to watch, I like to play
.25. What fabric detergent do you use? Bounty
26. Coke or Pepsi? I hate both
27. Are you a morning person or a night owl? NIGHT !
28. What is your shoe size? 5 1/2
29. Do you have any pets? 2 dogs, 1 rat, a cat, a guinea pig
30. Any new and exciting news you would like to share with family &friends? Nope
31. What did you want to be when you were a child? Princess (ah, she made it )

Valentines '06

Will be spent the same way all of my Valentine's have been spent with my husband.

Alone

I am a restaurant widow and my husband is the GM of a very fancy-pants restaurant here in the land or Ports and he is going to "Break a Record" tonight and he is so Gosh Darned Excited he can hardly see straight.

So I will spend Valentine's Day alone, the same way I spend Mothers Day, New Years Eve, New Years Day, Christmas, and some Thanksgivings.

But miraculously, he always has Father's Day off. Go Figure.



I am not bitter. I passed bitter about 5 or 10 years ago. I know that even if I DID have my husband at home and we WERE dumb enough to try to have a nice night out on any of those days, more than likely, it would suck. Because those are the days the bajillions of dumb asses go out, and everything is crowded, late, over cooked and cold. Or as we prefer to call them "amateur Nights".

Instead I know, that my wonderful Valentine has taken a week off work, and we will escape to the coast for 5 days, where it is going to be cold but SUNNY ! We have a beach front hotel room, with a fireplace and an indoor heated pool for the munchkins. We will spend time with, and time without them. We will shop, we will eat out, we will wine and dine, we will do 500 piece puzzles, and I will have the best Valentine's Day ever. It will just be a few days late.

I love you Bri....


edited to add...

Sometimes blogging comes back to bite you in the butt. Seems like last year we did have a Valentines Day Date See Bri, I bet now you are really GLAD ( you know, instead of embarassed ) that I am documenting our lives....

The strangest damned thing happened this weekend....

Saturday night, DH and I went out to dinner with my parents and had a wonderful meal full of laughter! Conversation! And of course wine!

We get home, hot tub, snuggle and nod off into dream land.

Well, I did at least.

Brian was woken up around 12:30 AM by one of our dogs crying and whining. Brian gets up to see what she is fretting over, and he finds our other dog, our gigantic humongous black lab, lying on the floor, completely rigid, shaking. His head is lying in a pool of saliva and he is foaming at the mouth. He isn't conscious, his eyes are rolled back in his head. He then starts to choke and gag and Brian can see his choking on his tongue. Barks was in the throws of a Grand Mal Seizure.

Now my wonderful husband thinks "OMG my dog is dying, I have to help him....I will put my hand in his mouth and grab his tongue so he will not choke and die"

Any idea where I am going with this?

Here's where I come in....I am awoken my my gigantic husband lunging around the bedroom screaming "There's something wrong with Barclay!!" and I am thinking "Good God, there is something wrong with you...What the hell are you doing falling all over the place"

and then I see his hand....


and the blood


the gallons of blood


I get up and I look at my dog who has now urinated all over himself as well as defecated. He is shaking and it appears that he is dying. I look at my husband who is lying in bed covered in blood and slipping into shock. And I think "huh, what the HELL am I supposed to do?" He tells me to help Barkley but to make sure I STAY AWAY FROM HIS MOUTH ! ( ya' think?) I get a towel under BArks head and it starts to clean up some of the mess, but he is just covered in every bodily fluid he possess. I talk to him real calmly and he starts to stop shaking. I can tell whatever has happened is starting to come to an end. Eventually he kind of comes to and looks at me like "what the hell was THAT?" I get him outside, get him some water, clean up the mess, and go to my DH.

He is shaking so hard and I say "Bri, you are going into shock, we have to take you to the hospital". He says, " No, really, I think it's going to be ok" I look at his hand and it appears as though Barkley had bitten completely through his hand. I say " uhhhhhhh, I am pretty sure we have to go NOW" he refuses, I try more he he refuses more, so I say fine, lay there and bleed to death. Bastard.

Morning comes, Brian showers, and we realize the inside of his hand is making it's way outside and it freaking GROSS, let me tell you. I say "how 'bout now tough guy, ready to go?" ( cause I am sympathetic like that) he agrees, but only if he can drive ( wtf?) We head up to the urgent care clinic by our house. They take one look at his hand and bypass all the other people who have runny noses, and get him in.

I say : "You know you are getting stitches, right?"

Brian: " Like hell I am"

Me: " what the hell are you TALKING about? All of the muscles in your hand are oozing out.What do you think they are going to say?"

B:" Listen, all I am saying is, I am going to negotiate stitches"

Me:" negotiate stitches? '.....That is the quite possibly the DUMBEST thing I have ever heard you say."

B: " I doubt it"



B gets called back. The doctor takes one look at his hand and says" Uhhhh, what are you doing here? You need to go to the Emergency Room immediately. You need like a SURGEON, and most likely, a hand specialist as well" B comes out and tells me this and I say "Fine, I will drive you to St V's, it's just down 217" He then wants to argue with that, saying no, I think we should go downtown to Good Sam because I am going to get a better deal with my insurance blah blah blah and I am just looking at him like he has fucking ROCKS IN HIS HEAD because his hand looks like hamburger meat and WHO CARES ABOUT THE BEST DEAL RIGHT NOW!!!


But I, you know being very calm and all, say fine, whatever you want, lets just GO.

So long story short, we get down there they get him in and the doctor said, this happened how long ago? B replies, uh, about 12 hours. The doctor says " I can't sew this up, it's already infected....you know because you waited 12 hours before seeking medical attention We are going to have to clean it our and steri-strip it until Wed and we can sew it up then" And I was really surprised he didn't throw in there " You really should have listened to your wife and come in last night because not only is she BEAUTIFUL, she is obviously very smart and from now on, you should just listen to her dammit!" But he didn't.

Anyways, They take a big huge needle and jam it in that puppy 15 times. They then get all in there and clean it out ( gag gag) steristrip it, give him his prescriptions, and tell him to come back on Wednesday.

While we are waiting for the nurse to get him all wrapped up, the doctor and I are talking. He tells me he has two Goldens at home, and one of them has seizures. I say "Really? Have you ever tried putting your hand in his mouth during one of them?" He kind of chuckles and says " No, can't say that I have"





Anyhoo, here's a little blurb about seizures in dogs I found on line....

"Regardless of what you have heard, DO NOT reach into the dogs mouth to grab the tongue in an attempt to keep it from swallowing its tongue.
During thirteen years as an animal emergency technician, I couldnt count the number of owners who went to the hospital room while someone else brought their dog to our clinic. Although conscious, the dog is absolutely unaware of what is going on around it and those clenching jaws can do serious if not permanent injury."

You know just for in the future if anyof you come across a dog having a Grand Mal.

Demolition has begun...

Friday Quiz....

You Belong in London

A little old fashioned, and a little modern. A little traditional, and a little bit punk rock. A unique woman like you needs a city that offers everything. No wonder you and London will get along so well.

What City Do You Belong In?

Heelys

She finally got them...

As promised

We prayed.

We prayed Hard.

I am wondering how Carrie is feeling this morning. I noticed the time on her reply at DT's blog was 12 am. Carrie, how many times must we tell you, don't drink and go on line? Here is an email we all received from her. Please take a moment to enjoy the typos ....

"Oka y, so I'm on mymission, but I can't find George or even Mark ( edit) . Actually, I can't find anyone. Give me whatever ifo you have so I can complete my mission. I'm drunk. Good night."

How much do we love our little birthday girl?

Below are pictures. I am too tired to come up with any clever captions. Please caption them yourselves...

Charlotte and Carrie

Silly and Dingus's Wife.

Here we are praying for D.T.'s evening to go well. We weren't drunk dumb enough to order martinis.

If you like white wine, please sit on the left side of the booth, if you like red wine, please sit on the right side.

This is Geoff with a G. This is the same poor soul who waited on us last time and the is the man that we tricked Dingus's wife into thinking she made out with. Poor Geoff with a G had to bring us many many glasses of wine.

Hump Day

I have had to be somewhere where I had to be "responsible" every night this week. All of Oakland Heidi's thoughts whirling through my head of "ohhhhhh, how can I get out of this" knowing full well that I can't. It's not that I don't WANT to go...It's just that I do WANT to stay home in my jammies with my babies by the fire all snuggly.

Tonight is no exception. The up side being, I have to be somewhere where I am allowed to be completely irresponsible ( and trust me I am very good at that) which is DBC, or Drunken Book Group. The ladies and I will wear some sort of bottoms that allow us to eat and drink to our hearts content. This month it is Carrie's birthday month which was actually in January but we had to reschedule in December because I had to go and try and WOW! Bono with my boobies but unfortunately he didn't see me ( or maybe he did but he shuddered and looked the other way..) ANYHOO, tonight is her free pass and we will load her up good and plenty with lots of Happy Hour Food and drink. We will trick Miranda into believing that "OMG you TOTALLY made out with that waiter in college...Don't you REMEMBER?" And she will, for a very small moment think "Omgosh, I did, I did make out with that waiter" because oh, the boys the four of us kissed were many and no, we can not possibly remember them all, nor do we want to...

Beat that run on sentence blogger bitches...can't wait to see when I get Googled for "Blogger Bitches"

So that is where we will be this evening discussing _The Doctor's Wife_ which was very good and entertaining. I am willing to bet we discuss the book for 15 minutes out of the three hours I suspect will be there for. But don't tell our husbands that because then they will think we just have this "night out eating, drinking, giggling with the girls while neglecting our husbands and children" once a month, which Hello? We DON'T it's (air quote) BOOK GROUP ( air quote).



And how is it when I spell checked this post "blogger" came up as a questionable word, but bitches didn't?

Spring Fever is such a tease

Because you just know this isn't the weather we are having until May. Every window in the house is open...WIDE. The neighborhood gang is outside terrorizing the neighborhood equipped with magnifying glasses, flashlights, a box of Ziplocs, a baseball bat, soccer ball and Jack's Plasma Car. Not exactly sure where on the street they are, but I can hear them so I know they are fine. They are probably traipsing through the back and front yards of all of our neighbors.

We are of course, going to watch the Bowl along with all the rest of America. Junk food, and booze galore. We will also being playing Monopoloy since none of actually care about the Bowl, but being a. An American and b. A Pacific NW-erner and ex Seattle residents, we are pretty much legally supposed to watch The Bowl. And to be honest, any event that requires me to eat and drink at, consider me there.

Off to Spring Clean more and more and more....

Today we did a big Valentine Day shop and got all of our classroom goodies and premade valentine's. Jack picked (surprise) Spongebob and Dags picked some kitty/puppy ones with such oh so witty sayings. When my 7 year old sat down to fill his out, he told me, "Uh, there is ONE inparticular that I will be doing last, just so you know....You know what they say 'save the best for last'. That's what I am doing...I am sure you know whose it is."

I say no, I don't and I know. I am obviously being baited to Please. Press On. Beg Me To Tell. I feign indifference and tell him that's nice dear now start working.

"And you should probably know" he goes on " It starts with a 'J' ".

I continue making dinner and being more interested in my shrimp then my son's love life. Because I have learned that from birth, men run away from you the minute you show them you are interested. All my life I thought "what is it? Is it me? Why do the boys run from me at the bar party dorm dance game kegger playground when I show them I am interested?" and then one popped out of my loins and I began to raise him and then I figured out "OMG, they ALL do it and they can't HELP it" It is as innate as armpit farts and constant penis tugging. So I know the more disinterested I am, the more info I get.

"OK, OK !! I'll tell you....GAWD! It's Janie. Janie is going to get my special Valentine. I think I will write her a letter inside"

This of course delights me greatly as Jane ( or Janie as she is now going by) is my number one draft pick for Jack's arranged marriage. Seriously. SO instead of saving the best for last, he gets to work on hers right away. He tries to make Spongebobs mouth into an "o" shaped, like he's all surprised or something ( but it ends up looking like a big scribble mark on the card) And then he writes his letter to her and it says...

" I luv you"

and omg my maternal grandmother ovaries twitched. It was just so sweet and 1st grade boy because very soon, you know like 2nd grade some boys turn girls into satanic voodoodolls and curse and choke them whenever possible...But for now, my little boy is still sweet and kind and writing to his best gal that he luvs her.

Last year in Hawaii...

Jack asks us at least once a week "When can we go back to Hawaii?" Brian and I are completely beside ourselves with the mere idea of the morning we wake him up and take him the Island. I hope all the traveling we do with our kids develops a healthy wanderlust in them as they grow older.

I just bought four airplane tickets to somewhere very nice and warm and sunny where the people like to hula.

We aren't telling the kids. We are just waking them up and saying " Hey, lets not go to school today. Lets go to Hawaii instead"

Hee hee hee

I am half way thru Lushy Lemon's Book Group Selection and I am quite scandalized on so many levels....The racism, the scandalous women, the political incorrectness of it all. I wish this book group was sooner because it is just so JUICY.

I am looking forward to next week's group and getting together with my women. We haven't had a Happy Hour Feeding Frenzy since NOVEMBER. We thought about trading it in for a Book Club/Super Bowl Party but I was NOT having it....I need my Alcohol Induced Drinking Therapy Book Group !!

Off to knit with Caffeine Induced Therapy Group Knitting Group !